It’s easy to think that others have all the breaks, or that you are somehow missing the necessary skills to be a viable human being. From the rest of this blog and other parts of your life you might also get the idea that you always need to be more than you are. I’m all for self improvement and never standing still, but sometimes this is not so much about actually going at it full throttle and maximising your skills as much as it is about understanding yourself, slowing down and having permission to just be you.
You are enough right now. You are enough for this moment, and you can’t be other than you are right now anyway. You are you.
Remember the journey we’re on. This blog isn’t called All The Things You Should Be, or All The Things You Need To Get Better At.
It’s All The Things You Are. Right now. Without changing anything. Just seeing what is already inside you, waiting to come out.
It’s a tremendous paradox, but only when you can be happy with yourself as you are can you really see where you want to go and what it will take to get there. All the time you’re worrying about whether you’re doing it right or what other people will think about how you live your life, you will miss the incredibly freeing truth that you are both OK as you are, and capable of more.
It needs to be both. The first two parts of this journey are all about making sure that before you even think about improving yourself, you know that you are enough. If you launch straight in at the things you need to be better at, it will always be a burden and a discouragement, evidence that you are not good enough, and that will never change as you get better. You’ll always find ways to fall short. But start with your already-OK-ness, and all your self-improvement will be from a position of strength, into another position of more strength.
Everyone needs people to lean on sometimes. But at the same time, you have to get to know that you are enough as you are. Not finished, not perfect, but enough to take the next step that will get you through.