Now that you’re nicely secure in your own built-in amazingness, after understanding that You Are Beautiful, what happens when we bring other people into it? I’d say that most of our insecurities come from how we perceive other people’s opinions of us. We use a lot of our emotional energy trying to jostle and position ourselves to be acceptable to others, often putting people down as we try to make ourselves seem better.
Of course that means that we’re on the receiving end of this treatment from other people doing this to us as well. We spend a lot of our time and energy either getting the brunt of someone else’s bad mood, or else (mis)interpreting something they have said through the lens of our own issues and getting in a twist about it.
Stage 2: You Are Loved is all about understanding that you have a valid place as a human being, you have value and importance just as much as anyone else, and even more than that – there are already other people out there who can see the value that you may not. You belong – you are not alone – you have people on your side, seen or unseen.
People’s perception of us can really erode our self-confidence, to the point that everything we may believe about ourselves in stage 1 can just disappear in a cloud of self-doubt. Actually, I think the biggest battles are to be won here. It’s relatively easy to believe in our own unique selves in isolation. Later, when we want to see what we’re capable of, that should be relatively simple as well – compared to the massive challenge of weathering the constant stream of messages we get from other people.
If you can really internalise both your inherent importance and your acceptance from (at least some) others, that will give you a stable grounding from which to start to realise your potential. It sets us up to move into Stage 3: You Are Capable – all about seeing your (sometimes hidden) abilities and gaining the confidence to stretch yourself and do more than you thought you could. I’m excited to see what we might unlock in people just like you as we start to explore these things. Can’t wait!